The To-Do List Isn’t the Boss of You
this to-do list is taking a personal day
The To-Do List Isn’t the Boss of You
A note for my fellow doers who are tired of running themselves into the ground
If you're like most ADHD entrepreneurs I work with, you're no stranger to the never-ending to-do list. It follows you everywhere — in your head, your inbox, that one app you swore would solve everything. It’s meant to help, but it often runs the show instead.
Let me say something that might sound weird coming from someone who helps people be more productive: Your to-do list is not your boss. It’s just a tool. And if it’s making you feel behind, frazzled, or like you’re always playing catch-up, it might be time to rethink the relationship.
You’re Not Failing — You’re Fried
Most of the ADHD business owners I support are not unproductive. They’re actually doing everything.
Running businesses. Managing teams. Raising families. Answering emails in the school pickup line. Trying to remember to drink water.
They’re high-capacity humans operating in overdrive — and that’s not sustainable. When your nervous system never gets a break, even crossing things off your list can feel hollow. The list becomes more pressure than support.
A More Supportive Approach to the List
I’m not anti-list. I’m a system lover through and through. But if the list is running you into the ground, it’s time to change how you use it.
Here’s what I often walk my clients through:
Get clear on what’s truly urgent vs. what’s just loud
Align your list with your actual values — not just deadlines
Build systems that work with your brain, not against it
Let rest be part of the plan (not a reward you never get to)
This doesn’t mean giving up on your goals. It means creating space to reach them without burning out in the process.
Redefine Progress on Your Terms
Some days, progress looks like a finished proposal. Other days, it’s protecting a no-meeting afternoon so your brain can breathe.
Both count.
If your list is staring you down today, here’s your reminder:
You get to decide how you work. Not because you’re failing — but because you’re finally building something that works for you.
-Niki